Since my daughter was born 12 years ago, I have had the privilege to say that I am part of 4 generations of women whom have been the first born of the family. What ‘s even more amazing is that the 4 generations are still alive. My Abuela was the first born, my mom (Abuela’s daughter) was the first born, I’m the first born and my daughter is also the first born. It is so special to me to be able to share that with all of you. God has granted me such a great blessing to be able to enjoy something so marvelous.
Although my mom and Abuela seem so humble, meek, submissive and nice they are powerhouses! One would think that because of all the hardships they have had to face, they would be defeated women. But they are not. They have managed to get up and continue life… with smiles and laughs.
In one way or another, the 4 of us have inherited many similar traits. We have the natural “1st born” syndrome, which is obvious with our “people pleasing” behavior. The one that is the most notorious for that is Abuela. She is a human form of a cameleon–taking any shape or form just to make sure no one gets offended, hurt or feel left out. She will give you her last dollar and even her last Coke just to make you feel good. If you meet her be ready to be part of the family.
My mom is just like that (especially when it comes to her kids and grandchildren). For example, once she gets the phone call that “we are on our way” (going over her house), she jumps to the kitchen to have something ready when we arrive. It could be anything from delicious ice cold lemonade to a full on gourmet salad. Notice I said salad. That’s because she is a health freak. Growing up she never bought us cereal that had sugar. Man that was stressful! LOL! Anyway, I’ve been a healthy adult for the most part. I probably owe it all to her. It is the heart of a loving mother, always wanting to give others the best of what she has to offer.
As I write, I’m laying here thinking, “How do I fit into the “1st Born” syndrome. I guess it’s hard to talk about ones self. Just like my mom and Abuela, I’m a worry wart. I think of every possible negative scenario and play it out in my head over and over again. I worry about everyone and can’t rest until I either get a text or send some “random text” about anything just to see if they are okay. So either they passed that down to me or it’s just part of being 1st born.
My daughter is also a people-pleaser. She is always trying to do the right thing to make mom and dad happy. She definitely is a leader in her own little way. She isn’t afraid to take risks but not on account of hurting those around her. She has a mind of her own and is very opinionated but always trying to say things in the nicest possible way. When it comes to her friends, she will do anything to make sure they are happy (I’m like that too). She is the best friend you can have.
I can’t tell you enough how honored I am to be part of this heritage. The ladies in my life aren’t flashy, eccentric nor women who need and want the best of everything. They do with what they have. They aren’t domineering women who make you do what they want. They would rather YOU do what you want. They aren’t women who give up. Nor will they let YOU give up. They are humble, meek, simple yet strong women whom with a smile will lift you and encourage you to be the best that “YOU” can be. I can only pray that my daughter and I inherit a portion of what they are. They are an inspiration to me and to those around them. And for that I honor them.
Photo Credit: Mayra Ariza Photography